Interestingly, this advice doesn't just work for you in an interview setting. I've been doing it in many settings where being autistically truthful would hurt you. It sucks but sometimes you have to present yourself in certain ways to get people in positions of authority to treat you like a person, like doctors, government people, interviewers etc. Or just in a social setting, because people are frustratingly insistent on asking probing questions like "so what do you do?", and an honest answer like "spend most of the day in bed in pain, being perpetually overwhelmed & dissociated" is a big no-no.
So I'd taken to presenting myself in as favorable way possible and keep that stuff to myself. For a while I struggled with this, because it feels like perpetuating falsehoods. I got over it for two reasons: 1) doing it only levels the highly unfair playing field a bit, and 2) it's not a lie when I present aspects of myself that are unequivocally true. I may not be a physicist anymore, but I still have most of the scientific skills. I may not be an occupational craftsperson or artist, but I have oodles of things I've made that show I have the skills. So I just mention those things, and not volunteer any "bad" details about myself. Neurotypical people don't seem to pay it any heed if you're being vague and opaque like that.
I feel like I totally dissociate during interviews - I learned a lot about how to get through them in college, and this piece reflects a LOT of those skills. Once you succeed in a few interviews you start to realize how little they can fact check you, and furthermore how little they even care to try. Give em what they want until you get what you want.
The last bit about this being unsustainable is also so very true.... I have the ability to do hella work, but not the drive, so I keep lowering the bar for myself. It's so hard to actually tell where the bar is from the bosses perspective, but I haven't seemed to hit it yet. Good performance review --> do less --> good review --> do less.... who knows when it'll end?
I’ve used (free versions) of services like JobScan which will compare your resume/cover letter to the job description and give suggestions of key words and synonyms to use. Don’t take all of their suggestions, just the ones that make sense to you. I found it helpful to use this versus trying to figure out substitutions all by myself.
I think that what helped me the most was representing clients before court. The judges have neither time nor interest in lengthy out of topic stories - you have to present your matter concisely and persuasively. So upon my job search I became my own client (this also helps a lot when you have to phone Some Important Institution in your own case). I also put much energy on merit preparation and had one-two light stories should small talk be required („when I finished my first half marathon, I felt empowered and decided I am ready to change jobs”).
Fortunately I was not asked what animal I am since I am a very cat person so not an ambitious lion 😂
yes! As a former debate kid, this must be part of why the particular game of self-advocacy in the professional realm has come easily to me. I know how to lay out a case and put the best evidence forward, and I thankfully have never been naive enough to believe an employer cares about what's true.
Interestingly, this advice doesn't just work for you in an interview setting. I've been doing it in many settings where being autistically truthful would hurt you. It sucks but sometimes you have to present yourself in certain ways to get people in positions of authority to treat you like a person, like doctors, government people, interviewers etc. Or just in a social setting, because people are frustratingly insistent on asking probing questions like "so what do you do?", and an honest answer like "spend most of the day in bed in pain, being perpetually overwhelmed & dissociated" is a big no-no.
So I'd taken to presenting myself in as favorable way possible and keep that stuff to myself. For a while I struggled with this, because it feels like perpetuating falsehoods. I got over it for two reasons: 1) doing it only levels the highly unfair playing field a bit, and 2) it's not a lie when I present aspects of myself that are unequivocally true. I may not be a physicist anymore, but I still have most of the scientific skills. I may not be an occupational craftsperson or artist, but I have oodles of things I've made that show I have the skills. So I just mention those things, and not volunteer any "bad" details about myself. Neurotypical people don't seem to pay it any heed if you're being vague and opaque like that.
I feel like I totally dissociate during interviews - I learned a lot about how to get through them in college, and this piece reflects a LOT of those skills. Once you succeed in a few interviews you start to realize how little they can fact check you, and furthermore how little they even care to try. Give em what they want until you get what you want.
The last bit about this being unsustainable is also so very true.... I have the ability to do hella work, but not the drive, so I keep lowering the bar for myself. It's so hard to actually tell where the bar is from the bosses perspective, but I haven't seemed to hit it yet. Good performance review --> do less --> good review --> do less.... who knows when it'll end?
fuck yes! Do less!
Freelance Photographer (2013-Present) lives on my resume forever, covering up all my employment holes 😎
helll yeahhhhhh i do that with data science consulting and writing gigs too!
I’ve used (free versions) of services like JobScan which will compare your resume/cover letter to the job description and give suggestions of key words and synonyms to use. Don’t take all of their suggestions, just the ones that make sense to you. I found it helpful to use this versus trying to figure out substitutions all by myself.
I think that what helped me the most was representing clients before court. The judges have neither time nor interest in lengthy out of topic stories - you have to present your matter concisely and persuasively. So upon my job search I became my own client (this also helps a lot when you have to phone Some Important Institution in your own case). I also put much energy on merit preparation and had one-two light stories should small talk be required („when I finished my first half marathon, I felt empowered and decided I am ready to change jobs”).
Fortunately I was not asked what animal I am since I am a very cat person so not an ambitious lion 😂
yes! As a former debate kid, this must be part of why the particular game of self-advocacy in the professional realm has come easily to me. I know how to lay out a case and put the best evidence forward, and I thankfully have never been naive enough to believe an employer cares about what's true.